Some cow humor.
Q: Why does a milking stool have only three legs?
A: Because the cow has the udder.
Q: Why do cows wear bells
A: Their horns don’t work.
Q: What’s a cow’s favorite moosical note?
Q: What do you call a cow with no front legs?
A: Lean Beef
Q: What do you call a cow with no legs at all?
A: Ground beef
Those last two just kill me.
If you’re wondering how to liven up your steak, try it in this gingery, garlicky stir fry. Soba noodles make the dish fun and the bok choy, almonds and carrots lend some crunch.
2 tablespoons sliced almonds
8 ounces soba (Japanese-style noodles)
1 tablespoon plus 3 tablespoons vegetable oil
12 ounces skirt or flank steak
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 green onions, whites and greens separated, chopped
4 garlic cloves, chopped
1 tablespoon grated peeled ginger
2 heads baby bok choy, quartered
1 carrot, peeled, thinly sliced on a diagonal
3 tablespoons oyster sauce
3 tablespoons soy sauce
3 tablespoons unseasoned rice vinegar
1 tablespoon toasted sesame oil
1. Preheat oven to 350°F.
2. Spread out almonds on a small rimmed baking sheet; toast in oven, tossing occasionally, until golden brown, 8-10 minutes. Let cool and set aside.
3. Cook noodles in a large pot of boiling water, stirring occasionally, until al dente. Drain; rinse to cool and set aside.
4. Heat 1 teaspoon vegetable oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Season steak with salt and pepper and cook until charred in spots, about 4 minutes per side for medium-rare. Let rest 10 minutes. Thinly slice against the grain.
5. While steak rests, wipe out skillet and heat 3 tablespoons vegetable oil over medium heat. Add white portion of the green onion, garlic, and ginger. Stir until softened, about 1 minute. Add bok choy and carrot. Cook, tossing occasionally, until crisp-tender, about 4 minutes.
6. Whisk oyster sauce, soy sauce, vinegar, sesame oil, and 1/2 cup water in a small bowl. Add to vegetables; bring to a simmer. Fold in rest of green onion, reserved almonds and noodles. Serve steak with noodle stir-fry.
Recipe from Bon Appétit Magazine
Darkness, new from Kalle Mattson, is quite lovely.
“Oh my blood so blue
I’ll sing a song for you
It’s a bleeding heart
and it’s gnawing to grow
Down in my bones”